I felt so regretful that I never make enough time to speak with you..

You must have felt the distance and got mad..

I can't help myself from feeling tired after work and whenever I told myself to take a short nap I'll end up sleeping...

I miss you so much Iain :(

I'm so sorry... I wish you will speak with me again

I had a feeling you were nice to me just cause you feel bad that your looking for someone else...

I feel horrible....

How can I ever forget about you when we share so much things together and now your looking for someone else....

How can I shake this off my head.....

I'm so jealous that I tried so hard, I couldn't get you back...........

Why are you doing this to me....

I burst into tears when you say those words...

I felt like I meant nothing to you..

So much fear.. I'm trembling..

I can't take this....

Why can't we be nicer to each other ?

Why can't you see the new me?

Why can't you love me.......

It's been torning me since day one that I want to win your attention or the slightest fondness...

I just can't stop feeling so bad about myself.. Just ugly and unattractive....

I want to be back with you.. I've still be waiting... I just wish you will like me again..........

I can't stop feeling lonely..... That it be even worst that you would've leave me for another girl....

Why can't I helped you? Why can't I make you happy?

I just can't stop being so selfish..

I promise I will not be insure I would learn....

I miss you so much....

I really wanna see you again...
I hope you do too...

February/March

I hate the feeling that I'm no longer yours. And I can't have you just for me anymore...

I've been hesitant to speak with you often now, cause I kept thinking that one day you will sleep with someone and it will totally depress me......

I hate this friendship... A friendship of nothingness but constant feeling of rejections...... I don't want to be just a friend.......

Why do I have to be blame for everything... You always like to shout at me just because I wanted you to continue what you saying as you always don't complete your sentence..........

You know I always wanted to be yours and be with you again...... It will be too devastating for me if you were to be with another girl......

I dare not walk away as I want you so bad...... But maybe if its like true blood, you say ' as your maker, I release you '
And I'll forever be gone from your life........ :(

Why were you so cold... Hiding away all your emotion... I know when I met you.. You were this bright happy guy.. So caring so loving and wants the best for me.. For both of us..

Where have you gone...........

All along I've been waiting...

I've been hopeful...

That one day I'll be able to win your heart again...

I failed... So bad...

I'm sick of hearing about the boyfriends of my colleagues everyday, I'm sick of seeing them being picked up by their bf... I'm sick of lying to them that I have a boyfriend when the fact is I'm all alone pretending to be happy. So I could live a less miserable life.

All these have eaten into me everyday.. Making me feel more and more lonely... So is every time I hang up my call with you I felt so rejected..
I thought if I could act as if I'm normal we'll get well together again and you will give me a chance again... I hold on my tears cause you hated them I silence myself about my feelings cause your avoiding them.. I do what I can... To make you less stress about with me so you be comfortable with me again...

I love how you would still chat with me and we watch movies together.. Acting like we were couple again.. But just so deep down inside I'm felt horrible knowing we're not together and you couldnt care less about me...

I'll never make you feel how I felt for you.. You may hear or seen it so many times but you never understand that all of this were truth and its my true feelings for you... So please don't tell me that it's because our distance........

I put up pictures of us in my Facebook so you maybe would go back and look how much I miss us being together in those places happily.....

I miss you so much Iain........

I wish all of this is just a big argument and that at the end of the day you will say your sorry and you love me.............................

And I wish you would understand my love for you and that I'm waiting for you......

Wait for you to say you'll love me again.....

Your the best thing that ever happen to me.... Don't go....

This battle is difficult... I always felt like I'm losing...

A lot of times in the night I felt so cold and lonely that I wish I could vanish into the air..

Every night is just episode of me crying with a heartache wondering when were you be mine and that I'll be love by you again

It was an awkward night last night.. My colleagues wanted to sit around and have coffee after class.. So bout 7 of us took the bus to Tampines.. 2 of them parted and decided to go home upon reaching tampines.

In the end a colleague is meeting up her bf at coffee bean and another is on his way there .. In the end I've to sit with 3 couples talking about their engagement and their upcoming marriage... I just kept quiet at a corner to listen.. Feeling abit regretful that I should have gone home like the rest... One of them even ask me if I've ever had bf :/

Wish you were here...