It just couldn't get any worst...

Now, I even lost the only person left I can speak to which is Iain...
I've been honest with him and tell him all my problem since the day he let me in and listen to my problems while I was in Australia..

The thing about Iain and I is whenever we have an argument it will only get worst and out of topic. He will eventually then hang up on me leaving me devastated and hanging at the worst feeling...

I realise that it's really all my fault that Im just a horrible person like Iain said. I only bring the worst out of people. Why am I like that? Why is a question asking if his not interested to speak with me anymore and that I will understand and not bother him anymore will lead to a huge argument of nothingness.. Ending up having him angry at me for having a go a him, which what I really do is asking a simple understanding question?

It's hard enough.. everything that's been going on.. Having the feeling that people just give up on you makes me feel so... worthless and hopeless...

But I found out one thing... Is that I'll never wanna be with someone that just hang up on me or walk away...

Guess I'm going back to the days where I just have to cry myself to sleep every night... Please... I just wanna feel better..... I wanna be normal