Holding my tears and worries...

Yesterday, My Mum was admitted to Changi Hospital during a seizure at work..

She was scanned and shown that she has a big tumor on front left of her brain.. After my sister break the news.. I just start crying without my mum knowing.. But I've to stop so that my mum wouldnt start thinking that something is wrong, as we didn't want to break the news to her just yet. Not in her dizzy and unstable condition.

My auntie start telling me that she's been very stress and mostly because of me and it's make me heartache and cry again.. I couldn't sleep at night cause I was awfully shock, scare and worried..Very sad that she didn't even know her condition..

Today, She was transferred to Singapore General Hospital's ICA.. She looks much better and hyper now with steroids to hold her pains..Doctor later then show us the scan result and explain to us in details.. It was an unpleasant surprise to see my mum's tumor was covering 1/3 of her brain and was pressing her brain to the right.. Lucky doctor mention that the surgery has a 90% chance of success.

Follow on.. It's the moment of truth and that the doctor review her condition and the tumor in her brain. She seems fine and accept that she has a tumor in her brain. But I worried that she might seems fine but when she's alone she will think about it and cry or stress over..

Due to that it's ICA.. We can't stay over by her bedside so we'll have to head home.. I hope the nurses there will company her cause she wont be able to sleep with her steroids running..

Just very worried for her.. wish to be by her bedside now.. if not because I've work tmr..

I know now how its feels like to neglect things and kinda regret when things happens.....

Thank you for being there for me...