i hate myself of what i've become...

the results of the past...

i know i'm not this person... and i hate to be...

for i've met someone i truly love.. my past haunts me and i becomes insecure..possessive.. and fear of losing everyone i love...

i see its all my fault... sometimes i cant help it... i wont forgive myself if i ever were to lose iain because of this...

i'm so eager for his love... or maybe just abit of attention or just him saying he love me out of the blue...

i still hope he reads my blog...

sigh... things just keep changing for the worst.... im trying harder and harder... just to even keep him...